Hilary Swank may have had no problem talking about her marriage problems in public, but Chad wasn't willing to engage everybody else in their business. End of story.

However, for the first time, Chad Lowe has revealed his thoughts about everything that happened this year. The actor admits he was shocked when his soon-to-be ex-wife revealed the reason behind their marital split, blaming their problems on his "substance abuse" to Vanity Fair.

In an exclusive interview with "Extra," Chad says he was very "disappointed" that Hilary decided to open her big mouth and share their marriage woes with other people who had no business of knowing. However, he's proud of the fact that, despite her confession, he has been sober for three years and is still going strong.

He said, "It has been a tough year and not something I expected. It's very humbling. I was disappointed that the details of our relationship became public. They were absolutely true, absolutely true. I've been sober for three and a half years and very grateful for that."

The actor admits Hilary will always hold a special place in his heart. With so much history together he says it's "not something you just shut off." Hilary may have exposed their dirty laundry to the public, but Chad refuses to trash talk his ex and wants everybody to know that she was there through the good and bad times.

Just like a gentleman, he said, "She was the love of my life and that's not something you just shut off. I will always love her. I am so grateful to Hilary for her support of me in a very difficult time in my life three and a half years ago. What hurt me more than anything is that people would think that she wasn't there for me and she was."

The couple - who had been married for nine years - separated in May.

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